I've had lots of things to tell you all lately, but I've not had the time to do so. I probably don't 'have' the time now, but there's something to be said for catharsis.
Most of you know about the break up already. So, I won't go into detail about the actual events.
It's funny how certain things just don't make sense until you go through them. This will probably seem silly: do any of you watch Sex and the City? I've always thought that the most painful episode of all is the one in which Carrie and Aiden break up for the second time, but she's not ready to get married. The episode just kills me, because of the way that it all fell apart so quickly. I mean, they had their problems, but within a few hours their entire relationship fell apart. I found this difficult to believe until I experienced it myself (though on a much less grand scale).
The two songs that defined my first week post-boyfriend were Feist's "Limit to Your Love" and Amy Winehouse's "Tears Dry on Their Own." I am such a woman.
My dad called yesterday to tell me that my dog is sick. All day yesterday I thought I might have to drive up to Dallas for them to put him down this weekend, but my mom called just now to tell me that he is not going to die quite that soon. It still makes me incredibly sad to think about my sweet dog slowly deteriorating. His liver is probably failing him, but my parents don't think they can afford to get him treatment for that. My poor baby. He's been with me since the 5th grade, and I can't imagine home without him. Also, I have no idea what my brother's dog will do when Ace is gone. Jordan has followed him around his entire life.
It's weird, because all of these difficult things have been happening to me, but I still feel like life is good. Just really hard sometimes. Of course the benefit to all these challenges is that they make the stress of final papers seem rather small in comparison, and working on papers is a nice distraction from worry. Never thought I'd say that!
This year I learned to ride a bike, had my first boyfriend, and my childhood pet may soon die. Most of these things happen to people long before the age of 24. It's as though I've experienced key elements of childhood and adolescence all in one year. On the other hand, I got fired, my brother got married, and I began graduate school--all grown up experiences. I can't help but view the irony of my own life.
The ability to laugh at yourself--this is one of the perks of maturity, right?
1 comment:
winehouse and feist? come on!
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